ASOD-----revisited!

Merhaba! (HINT: this greeting comes from a place where no one, particularly men, would want to spend any time in their prisons!)

HAPPY NEW YEAR to everyone!! Happy 35th birthday to my old ass!!! I turned 35 on 1-1-08 and celebrated in the RGV..VIVA LA RAZA y ZAPATA!!!!

I had an entire rant planned out for today’s ASOD, but all that changed at 7:47 am CST at the Exxon on “THE” 10 and UTSA Blvd. (“THE” 10, that was for you Jenny!). Whilst driving in from Comfort, TX I heard an ad for Exxon Bengal Traders Coffee. The premise was simple really, purchase any 20 oz. coffee or hot beverage and receive a free cinnamon bun or do-nut. Now, those who know me well know that I am NOT a coffee drinker. I don’t need coffee like some people need CEREAL and fresh milk! Bacon on the other hand, then I might have to go mid-evil on someone’s ass if I am denied bacon! But here of late I have acquired a taste for Exxon Bengal Traders English Toffee Cappuccino. So when the weather is a little brisk, I’ll stop in for a 20 oz. Toffee on my way to work. I have done this maybe 4 times. Well, when you throw in a free do-nut or cinnamon roll, now we’re talking baby!! Hook a brotha up! So I stopped in for some gas and my Toffee and do-nut. I should have turned around when I noticed this particular Exxon had NO FRIGGIN TOFFEE!!! I searched around and found a suitable replacement, Hot Chocolate. I grabbed my do-nut a proceeded to the counter. When the little Nazi behind the counter grabbed the do-nut to ring it up, BAM! There it was….$.59, then the choco, whatever the hell that was to total $2.09. I said..hang on a minute Smarty McSmartsmart…don’t I get a free do-nut with this here hot choco? Then…this little snit minimum-wager says to me and I quote, “It only rings up as free when you get a 20 oz beverage!”. I looked down and to my horror had a 24 oz. hot choco!! SKANK! You’re telling me that because I am spending another $.20 to get 4 more ounces your are charging me $.59 for a crappy ass do-nut! WTF, OMG, NROFLMAO, NLOL, totally NOT my BFF DAMNIT!!!! I could not believe it! But I did what any dude would typically do, I paid $.59 for the do-nut and walked out going…WTF just happened there? All I could see was Ricky Bobby saying….”THAT JUST HAPPENED”! That totally blew ass..but that is what I get for trying to be a coffee drinker! Where is my BACON DAMNIT!! As Mel Gibson would say in Ransom, “Gimme back my Bacon!” I am sorry bacon for cheating on you with Coffee or hot chocolate or whatever the hell it was…..damnit I can’t wait for the cruise! I am putting a freaking HURTIN’ on the breakfast buffet!

Stay tuned, for tomorrow I will discuss Steroids in Baseball, Roger Clemens and how the Ticket 760 sucks ass taking off the drive on Fox and replacing him with Dan freaking Patrick!!! WTF!!!!

Enjoy today’s song, It’s too late, by Timbaland. First of all, I did not know that POLOGIZE was a word! (The lyrics read APOLOGIZE, but the song clearly leaves out the “A”). Amazing what can be accomplished with a hooky catch phrase and poor grammar….MAS WORSER!!!!

It’s too Late
By: Timbaland

I'm holding on your rope,Got me ten feet off the ground
And I'm hearing what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down, but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around, and say...
Chorus
That it's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too lateI'd take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it's nothing new - yeah
I loved you with the a fire red
Now it's turning blue, and you say..."Sorry" like an angel
Heaven let me think was youBut I'm afraid...
ChorusWhoaa ohhh...Bridge (guitar/piano)hey,
hey...It's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, it's too late
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I said it's too late to apologize, yeah-
I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet... off the ground...